Dreaming IDEA

i have a dilemma again! you see there's this non-government organization in econ who offers very good training to students by form of publications etcetera etcetera. and they give allowances. now, they're opening one slot for anyone, because apparently, someone left his position, so it has to be filled. and i have so wanted to become part of the team...

by they way, the name of the organization is IDEA.

sheesh. one of my very good friends comes from IDEA, and she's been bugging me to join for days now.

nyay. i really want to, if not for pep. although...

why im still in pep:
1. i borrowed a bio book from one of my co-applicants, so it would basically look like i borrowed the book and ran away with it if i quit pep... for IDEA...
2. i happen to like the physical trainings in pep. keeps me pumped.
3. pep is extracurricular, and it is my only escapade from the daunting academic format i have got myself into. it keeps me sane.
4. my pep shirt is still being marked with an LA Gear tag, so im still waiting for its release.

why i want to be in IDEA:
1. it gives an allowance. money money, dude...
2. its a good training ground for whatever, they say. you get to make whole page publications by just researching everything on the internet. and you get closer to the econ professors...
3. i have good friends there. wala lang. ive just realized how much "alone-times" can make me a tad depressive. so as much as possible, i want to be in the company of people.
4. if you're in IDEA, you have free time and resources to research for things other than what is required by IDEA (i.e. your econ151 research memorandum...)

aargh. i really want to join. i asked aida (my friend from IDEA) to brief me again tomorrow. hala. as if i have the time. ewan. i think at the moment, it's either IDEA or PEP. not both. but i want both!! darn. kasi. pep can make inevitable negative cash flows from my allowance account in the near future, and i guess IDEA can fill in the void in an equal amount. haha, this is all in the terms of money. the econ-person me. haha.

if i quit pep, then id have more time for IDEA, more time for my bb42 bubble, more time for my friends, maybe i can even join tin and pie in their bi-weekly jogs around the acad oval, just as how we do it in pep. erf. i hate dilemmas.

and i just realized that i get the bigger picture of such decisions during the early morning hours. while im sleeping. i dream about them, and end up having a fucked up morning. deng.

waah! ok maybe i'll just consult ayen. she knows what's best...

-dilemma-