Letting Go

what world can be more cruel than this.

thinking of my inevitable eviction from econ makes me go numb. it's voiding, the feeling that i will eventually go away, after so much i have invested, after all the things i did to belong. maybe i was wrong in the first place, for investing my emotions on things that needed not, for trying to find a comfort zone when i should have just hustled and let go.

now econ is letting go of me. stupid subjects. stupid electives. i wonder when my decision complex will settle back to normal.

i wonder when i will be able to pick up from where i left off in high school.

if i will ever be able to.

every day from this day is doom's day.

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